“He should have access to his voice at all times,” she wrote. Out of context, it would be hard to know what to make of a statement like this, but I think most of us would be inclined to think it is correct, or good advice, or at least true as an aspiration. Unfortunately, in this case, it was more like a weapon. I should have expected it. After all, the internet seems to spawn a whole population of individuals
What kind of friend am I? I am always busier these days. I have children, so I can’t do anything for myself during “normal” hours. I’ve moved three time zones from one set of friends, two from the next, and I somehow need to make new friends where I live now in the middle of a pandemic. I don’t want to be a bad friend, but the deck is stacked pretty high. I am busy, stressed out, my life consists
I used to think that when people had children with severe disabilities, it would be something detected in the womb, or shortly after birth—that it would be obvious that something was wrong. But this was not at all the case with our son, Asa. Asa is the third of three boys. He was born after a mere two hours of labor, a big healthy baby weighing 10lbs exactly. I remember a hospital staff member saying, “Congratulations—you have a toddler!” For
I am not going to sugar coat it. No one in this world loves my son more than me. No one in this world gets hurt by my son more than me. He pulls my hair, sometimes clumps in his hand. He kicks me, punches, and throws his body with no care forcing me to strain my muscles to the limits while also covering me in bruises. But the thing he does that has caused me the most pain and
Community Submission by: Avis Avis is the mother of three boys: the older two are typically-developed, and her youngest, Bennett, has Phelan-McDermid Syndrome with autism. She is also a wife and a dentist. On June 16th, 2020, my 6-year-old son Bennett ran out of the house and jumped the fence. By the time we realized he wasn’t hiding or avoiding us, we could NOT find him. We live on a corner and we weren’t sure which direction he ran. We
Not long after I recorded the “Going Out” OHS Podcast episode, we decided to go to the beach as a family. Despite just talking about the very topic—how difficult it is to do family activities with Asa—I was still, somehow, unprepared. We went to a lovely, clean little beach that is a mere 45-minute drive from our home. I’m beginning this piece on my phone as I sit in my parked minivan with Asa, and this is my view. You’d
Dangerously Mobile – One who can move their body, but has limited awareness of the implications and boundaries of their movements. Think about it like this. Imagine you are on a boat. The boat is moving. It’s moving fast. You are trying to gain your balance and walk from one end to the other, but the waves are unpredictable, and it feels as though the ground is always in motion – because it is. Slowly you are making your way,
I made it ten years as a mother before I had to clean poop off of a wall. This isn’t a bad record considering we’ve had no break from changing diapers for the past decade. After all, many children go through a poop-smearing baby/toddler phase, and this is one gross habit my kids never got into—though there are plenty of others! A single, isolated poop-cleaning episode during year eleven of my marriage would not in itself be a noteworthy event—especially
